Here's the hard truth people - I've been slacking. A little extra here, a little snack there. I'm feeling it already. I was really terrible this weekend and completely overdid at dinner both Friday and Saturday nights. I will say that overdoing it now is much different than overdoing it before, but it still doesn't feel good.
Workplace temptations are getting to me. My workplace is very social, so it's expected that you will participate in every birthday, baby shower, team lunch, etc. Don't get me wrong - it's wonderful to have such a great group of people who really care about spending time together. The problem is the food. It adds up quick and it's constant. Everyone means well, but they just refuse to accept that I don't want to eat treats or desserts every day, or twice a week, or at all. It's such a part of that group culture that it's really, really hard to say no and still get to be part of the team. I appreciate that they want me to be a part of the group, but it seems like there should be other options rather than eating dessert. Some groups drink together, my group eats baked desserts together. The hard part is that all of them are pretty thin and have always been that way. They can get away with it. I can't. Sometimes, yes. But not this steady stream of processed sugar. Frankly, I don't WANT to eat it. Desserts just aren't really my thing. I know, I know - how is that possible? Well, it is. I feel resentful that in order to participate I'm expected to do something I don't want to. It sounds like we're going around bullying or stealing, doesn't it? Sometimes I really do feel silly about being so bothered by this, but I haven't felt group pressure like this in a really long time. It's so weird and frustrating. So I'm trying to balance. I'm making concessions here and there, but mitigating the damage by having very small portions. I also wonder if I'm just rebelling. Saying no just to say no. If I have some, even just a little bit, they seem satisfied. It's so strange. I guess I know how uncomfortable it makes me when other people bother me about what I eat, so I try not to do it to others. But there's a couple people in this group that are just total food pushers. I don't know, I'm still figuring out what to do with this. Maybe they worry about me too. I'm pretty regulated in what I eat and I think that's really foreign to them.
But I AM making progress. I told them that for my birthday I want a salad party. They actually thought it was a perfect idea.